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6 phrases that can change your life
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The 8 worldly dharmas: the art of detachment and impermanence
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п»ї<title>Educating is a beautiful responsibility</title>
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п»ї<title>The 8 worldly dharmas: the art of detachment and impermanence</title>
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<img src="https://lamenteesmaravillosa.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/padre-leyendo-un-cuento-a-sus-hijos.jpg">
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[IMG]https://lamenteesmaravillosa.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/imagen-budista.png[/IMG]
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Educating is a responsibility, a discovery and a moral duty that parents acquire when they decide to be parents. A wonderful journey full of mistakes and successes that is worth facing.
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The 8 worldly dharmas refer to those blockages, worries or attachments that cloud our awareness and ability to be happy. Thus, Buddhism as well as psychology itself reminds us that living attached to certain dimensions, such as pride, material goods or the desire for profit, pushes us to an existence of lack and suffering.
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As a good parent, you want the best for your children: that they become good men or women, that they do not make the same mistakes as you, that they stand on their own two feet, and so on. But, be careful, if you want the happiness of your little ones you will have to teach them some things personally; that is to say, to take action.
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It is often said that Buddhism is a house full of beautiful treasures. However, from our markedly Western point of view, it is common that sometimes we do not know how to distinguish or appreciate the beauty of these riches that are agglutinated in this philosophical and spiritual framework.
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Why personally? Because what we are taught by the people we love is engraved much more deeply in our memory. Whether for better or for worse, the teachings conveyed to a child by the people of reference are going to be the pillars with which he or she is going to start exploring the world.
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The principles of Buddhism and the practice of the Dharma are not easy to carry out, and the reason for this is in our mentality, in the type of culture in which we live daily and that somehow ends up molding us.
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"The first task of education is to stir up life, but to leave it free to develop."
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"Dharma is the discipline of living the truth; it is not knowing or reading the truth, it is not commenting on it or discussing it, it is not its logic, it is not its reasoning."
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-Maria Montessori
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-Yogi Bhajan
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Think that if you don't do it, others will do it who could care less about your child. We are talking, for example, about television, video games, books... we are talking about any medium through which the child can receive answers to the questions that arise and that you have not given him.
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Hence, there are many experts in these currents that recommend us a simple advice. It does not matter if we know nothing about the subject of the chakras, about meditation or the supposed vital energy contained in kundalini yoga. Those practices that many handle almost without knowing have no relevance if we do not first know the 8 worldly dharmas.
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To educate is to provide the right questions
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Because immersing ourselves, delimiting and working on this set of common concerns, is undoubtedly the first step to our spiritual awakening. It is the threshold of Buddhism, it is to be able to let go of our obsessive thoughts and social desires to leave behind our eternal fear of loss. Our fixation on profit, on the meaningless attachment...
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But be careful, educating is more than giving answers. It is to make it easier for the child to ask the right questions at the moments when he is ready to understand the answers. Moreover, to educate is to teach how to find those answers when they are not within reach.
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The 8 worldly dharmasThe 8 worldly dharmas speak to us above all of two concepts: detachment and lack of permanence. These ideas, these concepts, are undoubtedly our real nemesis, this shadow that haunts us and that we never end up seeing or recognizing. Thus, within our mentality and behavior, there are many of us who orient our existence in relation to certain dimensions, needs, people and materials that we consider essential to feel good.
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In this education, do not discard any subject. Yes, I am referring to issues that have been taboo in our society until very recently and in some households still are.
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We live attached to all these dimensions without understanding, without intuiting that nothing in this world can be retained forever. In our daily life, we live with certainties, attachments and expectations because they give us a sense of control. And if there is one thing we like, it is to have everything under control. However, there is nothing so volatile, capricious and immanent as life itself.
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For example, sexuality. There are homes in which, when a scene with sexual content appears on television, they change the channel, look the other way or get red in the face. Thus, little by little, they teach the little ones that this kind of things are shameful and should be excluded from communication.
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Hence, any change destabilizes us. Every variation, failed expectation or unfulfilled goal leads to suffering and stress. For the Dharma, as long as our mind remains contaminated by these eight worldly principles we will never be free or noble. So, let us see what dimensions this framework of Buddhism refers to.
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On the other hand, by avoiding the subject, what they do is to awaken the curiosity of the little ones and leave them at the mercy of what they can find; content that is not always good or appropriate for their age.
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First pair: attachment to material possessions/ aversion to not receiving them or being separated from themThe 8 worldly dharmas are established in 4 pairs of attachment and aversion. Thus, the first of these refers to something that will be very familiar to us. We speak, of course, of our need to possess and the fear that comes from thinking about the distance or the damage to what we understand as ours. A thousand examples illustrate this: our attachment to technology, to certain brands of clothes, shoes, our cars, etc.
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The importance of providing answersIn the past, what children could find on most of these topics was not much, but now they have Internet-enabled mobiles at an early age. Today they have at their fingertips a world in which truths and lies are intermingled without having internalized any kind of criteria to separate them.
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It is clear that many of these things we consider essential for our daily lives: they serve us to work and to give a certain image. However, the problem lies in experiencing a clear suffering when we do not have access to these objects, when we lack them and perceive our absolute dependence on them. This is undoubtedly a very relevant worldly dharma to work on.
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On the other hand, if we do not provide them with the answers they demand, they will stop using us as a source of information. Moreover, when they find the information through other media, of which they are passive consumers, they will not integrate the topics in their communicative capacity so that, when they have a partner and want to talk about sex?
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Second pair: attachment to recognition, approval and fame/ aversion to censure or disapprovalWe all, in some way, need to feel validated, recognized and approved by those around us. We are social beings and these security ties allow us to function with greater ease. However, the problem, as always, comes when that need becomes a priority and constant. When we are unable to live without that external reinforcement, without that praise, without that permission, without that like in our photos, without that approval from our families, partners or coworkers.
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Do you think they will dare, that they will be skilled at doing? No, because he has learned that it is a shameful subject in words and will do what he has learned from Google and his peers.
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Not knowing or not being able to live without those reinforcements or experiencing blocks or anxiety when we are censured or disapproved is another absolute source of suffering. Another of the pillars of the 8 worldly dharmas that we are obliged to identify and change.
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Third pair: attachment to a good reputation/ aversion to a bad imageWhat does living conditioned by having a good or bad reputation imply? It basically implies not being free, not being able to act, feel, live and develop according to our desires. Because those who are concerned about what others think or what others may conclude about our appearance, actions or words, completely veto their own personal growth. It is not the right thing to do.
 +
"When you do what you like, with passion, without receiving any retribution, and you lose track of time....
 +
When you do it for the simple fact that you are happy doing it and you are also serving others, that is when you are in Dharma."
 +
-Yogi Bhajan
 +
Fourth pair: attachment to the pleasures of the five senses/aversion to unpleasant experiencesThis pair of the 8 worldly dharmas may cause us some contradiction. What is wrong if we orient our existence to those five senses with which to savor life in all its forms, tastes and sensations? Even more... why not dislike what is unpleasant or uncomfortable?
 +
To understand this, we must put ourselves in the context of Buddhism. In this vision where the frugal, the humble and the just nourish every conduct, there is no room for excesses. In this philosophy the elevated passions, gluttony, desire, need do not harmonize... In balance is moderation and well-being, and it is at that point of not needing anything, where the conscience is freed from the material, where wisdom, compassion and authentic spiritual progress appear.
 +
"Water cannot accumulate on the top of a mountain,
 +
and true merit does not accumulate on the crest of pride."
 +
To conclude, it is quite possible that these 8 worldly dharmas seem to us somewhat complicated to delimit and transform. This is because within our conception it is very difficult for us to give up the fantasy of permanence, to embrace the idea that we are not in absolute control of everything that happens.
 +
However, let's keep the essence of these approaches, let them inspire us to shape a more autonomous life, free of selfishness, hollow pride, empty needs and thoughts that do not allow us to grow as people.
 
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9 phrases to educate in values
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The 4 types of Buddhism
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Children are like sponges, they absorb everything they hear. That is why it is essential to pay attention to what we, as adults, tell them. We present you...
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It is not classified like other religions, according to hierarchies. However, we can find different schools, branches or types of Buddhism....  
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It is a challenge to teach children personally when we have full-time jobs or when they are in a complicated stage, such as puberty. When children are young, they are with their parents as much as possible. However, with adolescence this is not the case.
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Adolescents step away and start and try to walk through the world as confidently as they have done in their circle of trust. However, they soon realize that outside of where they were, not everything works like where they were.
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This attracts and frightens them in almost equal parts. They can go from feeling like giants to dwarfs in an instant. However, if everything goes well, they won't want to go back, and it's a good thing they don't.
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The bad thing is that sometimes, in order to defend this independence, they try to cut ties that they will continue to need, although not as much as before or in the same way.
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So, the second challenge for parents is to grow up with their children. Do you remember how he started to walk: hesitant, clumsy, with some falls, and what did you do as parents? You let him lean and cling and only intervened when he could suffer a serious injury.
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Tips for educating your childrenAs the child grows and begins adolescence, he will continue to fall and will continue to need to feel that you are there. But many times they will prefer to hold on to other places or fall rather than ask for your help because they need to learn.
 
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Unless he can suffer a strong damage, let him, let him get an unfair grade, let him suffer his first disappointment in love, let him discover that a friendship he thought was true is not true, that you are fallible and full of mistakes... Because this is what happens in life, because it is necessary to discover the good things in life.
 
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If you do not allow him a disappointment, you will also deprive him of a possible reconciliation. If you intervene when someone betrays his friendship, you will not allow him to learn to accept an apology. And if you protest to a qualification for him, you will not be letting him know the power he has to turn things around.
 
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It's the easiest thing to do: son, don't do this because it's bad. Go a step further and give him reasons. Don't forbid smoking because by doing so you point to cigarettes as a potential form of rebellion. Explain to him the reasons why smoking does a lot of harm in the same way that any kind of drug does.
 
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Give him arguments he can turn to for counter-arguments when someone denies that smoking is bad. Let it not be your word against a stranger's, but your arguments against his.
 
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Let him understand that you need himLet him help you, let him gradually establish a reciprocal relationship with you. It is important that as he grows up he knows that he has many things to contribute to your life. That you are there to give and that you will give him, but that you also need things from him and they are no less important.
 
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You will probably never reach a symmetrical relationship, but it is good that it is becoming more and more asymmetrical in this sense.
 
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It's his life and his expectations
 
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Help him discover his dreams, what he really wants. Maybe you want something else for him, you had imagined him growing up to be a renowned physicist and he wants to be an actor. Don't try to change him, because you have no right.
 
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Even if you want the best for him, if you go against what he wants to be - what he wants to achieve - you can do him immense harm. Just as it is essential that you nurture their body when they are small, when they start to grow, it is essential that you nurture their dreams.
 
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It doesn't matter if it's a profession that doesn't pay too much or that few end up doing it, your child deserves at least one chance to get it. Who says one says two, three, four, five, as many as he wants as long as he can hold on to the walls or fall and get up without having hurt himself too much.
 
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Don't worry, in this sense you will learn too. When you are by his side to see the happiness he transmits when he does what he wants, you won't have to pretend to be proud because you will be the proudest parent on the planet.
 
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Also, I advise you to always be there when he takes a little step towards his dream because if you don't, I can assure you that when he gets it, you will regret it.
 
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Revision as of 13:58, 27 January 2022

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п»ї<title>The 8 worldly dharmas: the art of detachment and impermanence</title> [IMG]https://lamenteesmaravillosa.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/imagen-budista.png[/IMG] The 8 worldly dharmas refer to those blockages, worries or attachments that cloud our awareness and ability to be happy. Thus, Buddhism as well as psychology itself reminds us that living attached to certain dimensions, such as pride, material goods or the desire for profit, pushes us to an existence of lack and suffering. It is often said that Buddhism is a house full of beautiful treasures. However, from our markedly Western point of view, it is common that sometimes we do not know how to distinguish or appreciate the beauty of these riches that are agglutinated in this philosophical and spiritual framework. The principles of Buddhism and the practice of the Dharma are not easy to carry out, and the reason for this is in our mentality, in the type of culture in which we live daily and that somehow ends up molding us. "Dharma is the discipline of living the truth; it is not knowing or reading the truth, it is not commenting on it or discussing it, it is not its logic, it is not its reasoning." -Yogi Bhajan Hence, there are many experts in these currents that recommend us a simple advice. It does not matter if we know nothing about the subject of the chakras, about meditation or the supposed vital energy contained in kundalini yoga. Those practices that many handle almost without knowing have no relevance if we do not first know the 8 worldly dharmas. Because immersing ourselves, delimiting and working on this set of common concerns, is undoubtedly the first step to our spiritual awakening. It is the threshold of Buddhism, it is to be able to let go of our obsessive thoughts and social desires to leave behind our eternal fear of loss. Our fixation on profit, on the meaningless attachment... The 8 worldly dharmasThe 8 worldly dharmas speak to us above all of two concepts: detachment and lack of permanence. These ideas, these concepts, are undoubtedly our real nemesis, this shadow that haunts us and that we never end up seeing or recognizing. Thus, within our mentality and behavior, there are many of us who orient our existence in relation to certain dimensions, needs, people and materials that we consider essential to feel good. We live attached to all these dimensions without understanding, without intuiting that nothing in this world can be retained forever. In our daily life, we live with certainties, attachments and expectations because they give us a sense of control. And if there is one thing we like, it is to have everything under control. However, there is nothing so volatile, capricious and immanent as life itself. Hence, any change destabilizes us. Every variation, failed expectation or unfulfilled goal leads to suffering and stress. For the Dharma, as long as our mind remains contaminated by these eight worldly principles we will never be free or noble. So, let us see what dimensions this framework of Buddhism refers to. First pair: attachment to material possessions/ aversion to not receiving them or being separated from themThe 8 worldly dharmas are established in 4 pairs of attachment and aversion. Thus, the first of these refers to something that will be very familiar to us. We speak, of course, of our need to possess and the fear that comes from thinking about the distance or the damage to what we understand as ours. A thousand examples illustrate this: our attachment to technology, to certain brands of clothes, shoes, our cars, etc. It is clear that many of these things we consider essential for our daily lives: they serve us to work and to give a certain image. However, the problem lies in experiencing a clear suffering when we do not have access to these objects, when we lack them and perceive our absolute dependence on them. This is undoubtedly a very relevant worldly dharma to work on. Second pair: attachment to recognition, approval and fame/ aversion to censure or disapprovalWe all, in some way, need to feel validated, recognized and approved by those around us. We are social beings and these security ties allow us to function with greater ease. However, the problem, as always, comes when that need becomes a priority and constant. When we are unable to live without that external reinforcement, without that praise, without that permission, without that like in our photos, without that approval from our families, partners or coworkers. Not knowing or not being able to live without those reinforcements or experiencing blocks or anxiety when we are censured or disapproved is another absolute source of suffering. Another of the pillars of the 8 worldly dharmas that we are obliged to identify and change. Third pair: attachment to a good reputation/ aversion to a bad imageWhat does living conditioned by having a good or bad reputation imply? It basically implies not being free, not being able to act, feel, live and develop according to our desires. Because those who are concerned about what others think or what others may conclude about our appearance, actions or words, completely veto their own personal growth. It is not the right thing to do. "When you do what you like, with passion, without receiving any retribution, and you lose track of time.... When you do it for the simple fact that you are happy doing it and you are also serving others, that is when you are in Dharma." -Yogi Bhajan Fourth pair: attachment to the pleasures of the five senses/aversion to unpleasant experiencesThis pair of the 8 worldly dharmas may cause us some contradiction. What is wrong if we orient our existence to those five senses with which to savor life in all its forms, tastes and sensations? Even more... why not dislike what is unpleasant or uncomfortable? To understand this, we must put ourselves in the context of Buddhism. In this vision where the frugal, the humble and the just nourish every conduct, there is no room for excesses. In this philosophy the elevated passions, gluttony, desire, need do not harmonize... In balance is moderation and well-being, and it is at that point of not needing anything, where the conscience is freed from the material, where wisdom, compassion and authentic spiritual progress appear. "Water cannot accumulate on the top of a mountain, and true merit does not accumulate on the crest of pride." To conclude, it is quite possible that these 8 worldly dharmas seem to us somewhat complicated to delimit and transform. This is because within our conception it is very difficult for us to give up the fantasy of permanence, to embrace the idea that we are not in absolute control of everything that happens. However, let's keep the essence of these approaches, let them inspire us to shape a more autonomous life, free of selfishness, hollow pride, empty needs and thoughts that do not allow us to grow as people. You might be interested in...

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